Thursday, August 5, 2010

the scarlet letter.

"it's hard, but you know it's worth the fight
cause you know you've got the truth on your side
when the accusations fly, hold tight
and don't be afraid of what they'll say
who cares what cowards think anyway
they will understand one day, one day."

this is from a song in a movie, a movie i've loved for years and years, but is a little bit tainted for me now, because the lead role looks just like somebody i don't ever want popping up in my head (or yours). either way, these lyrics, i've had posted by my computer at work for months. they are oddly relevant to where i'm at in life right now.

i made a choice. a well informed, well thought out, long awaited choice. and for one reason or another, that choice seems to be up for public conversation and judgement. some don't care at all, some come up with theories or opinions out of thin air, and very few know the full on honest truth and stand by me and my choice. the point is, it was my experience. mine only. i know and cling to the truth, and that's why i couldn't give two shits about what people say or think, why i won't let that determine how or when i live my life. because i know my heart, and worked so hard at making the right choice, i'm confident in where i'm at and what i'm doing now. it's more than irksome to hear about people talking about my choice, my experience, when really, they have no information or grounds to speak on. but people always need a little entertainment, yes?

it's cheesy, but the truth really will set you free. i have the truth. and i don't have to share it or broadcast it or defend myself to anybody, it's plain and simple: i am not afraid because i make good decisions based on the truth. so talk. theorize. speak of the should haves and would haves. let assumptions and rumors dictate what you think or what your actions are. keep pinning that A on my chest. keep holding back because of fear and fear alone. i am sure and steady because i have the truth. unshakeable. unwavering.

steady now, steady now.

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